I need to be inside of you God.  I need to feel your light and the rays of your glory all inside of me and I need to feel me in you like I was before you sent me to earth to be born.  I need that supernatural closeness with you.   I need to see your face.  I need to see where your essence resides and see you on your glorious throne.  I need to hear your powerful voice.  I need to be able to worship you directly in your presence.  I need to see your unspeakable beauty.

In the past, I have wanted to hug you when I got to heaven, but I now realize that all I need to do is have the fullness of your light touch me. That is how powerful your glory is.  I need to give you the crown that I have been working so hard to get while I have been down here on earth, so that I can present it directly to you when I get to heaven.  I want to see all the beautiful things you have decorated heaven with.  I want to see the many other beings you have created.

I want to feel the unique relationship you and I will have. I look forward to communicating with you in a way that is totally foreign to me now.  I want to feel unspeakable joy.  I want to feel the full blast of your love that will supernaturally fulfill every desire that I will ever have.

I want to feel you wiping away all my sorrowful tears and experience you removing all pain from my memory and life forever. I want to have new experiences with you.  Whatever you want me to do I will now be able to do PERFECTLY for you. I will be able to love you like I have never loved you before!

I really want to be with you soooooo badly…. but God, you have made me an ambassador for Jesus, and I will NEVER get an opportunity to serve you in this way. So, God, please let me be able to share the gospel with a few more people before you call me home.  I would surely rather be with you in heaven, but I see the darkness that is taking over down here, and I want to shine as much light with my spiritual flashlight so that people have an opportunity see their way out of the darkness. Hope to see you soon, but until then, I am on duty…your ambassador, Tanya Nemley.

Philippians 1:21-24     21 For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22 If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! 23 I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; 24 but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body.

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