What is in my heart? I’m not liking it Lord!

June 17, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Prayer 4 Comments

Psalms 139:23 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:

I want to perfect for God….but I’m not. I have a heart condition in real life and in my spiritual life. In my real life I suffer from hypertension and PVC’s and I take medication for it. In my spiritual life I suffer from sin and I take medication for that too. I take a daily dose of scripture, a dose of prayer and a dose of Jesus forgiveness and this keeps my condition under control. I’ve had this condition all my life and in 1984 I had major surgery in which the problem was repaired. I understand that one day soon I will be totally healed of this problem, Praise the Lord!

Until then I will keep taking my medicine and keep going to the doctor….you know the great  physician named Dr. Jesus. Sometimes I go to His office and I’m in tears because I’m can’t deal with my situation, and I get so mad at people, my husband my kids and yes even you (smile here). I may say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing……..I might even fib……ok…lie….I hate to even say that….yuck! I still will tell a little lie….well alright….I know, a lie is a lie but I hate to admit that, I’m grabbing my heart right now….I think I need the doctor! The truth hurts.

I so want to be good. My spirit man is willing, but my flesh is weak. You know I think I’ve heard that saying before. Oh yeah…it’s on the medicine bottle. It also says don’t take on an empty stomach….you’ll feel worse.

What is really wrong with my heart? It has a condition called sin which can only be treated by the Lord if I am willing to take the treatment. He has to get me up on that operating table open me up and look around to see if there is anything clogging up my relationship with God. Things could be blocking my prayers or keeping me from being as effective in my sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with others.

I say….LORD…. WORK ON ME!!!   I take my medicine by letting the Holy Spirit reveal to me the ugliness in my heart, I confess my sins and ask for forgiveness……..and as singer John P Kee says in his hit song…WON’T HE MAKE YOU CLEAN INSIDE? I will be clean until……it happens again……oh man….back to the operating table….but remember we will be perfect when we get to heaven so……..TAKE YOUR MEDICINE DAILY OR YOU’LL STAY SICK!

Psalms 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

Message for today: Go to your earthly doctor, get checked out and stay well……..Go to you Spiritual Doctor (Jesus) and get checked out and stay well with your soul.

What does God look like?

June 16, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus Leave a comment

Isaiah 6:1 In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord, high and exalted, seated on a throne; and the train of his robe filled the temple.

God is a spirit so everything after this statement is what God has allowed me to know about Him as a point of contact and not His actual face to face appearance. The bible says no man will see God and live. Is it important to know what God looks like? No it’s not…it’s important that He is your God and His Son is your Savior. It is good though to have something in your mind to identify with Him. I believe that’s why God gave us many hints of His appearance in the bible.

When I became a committed Christian in 1984 I wanted to know what God looked like and I searched the bible to get a picture in my mind. I read He has hind parts, wings, a shadow, eyes, He can sit and He walks. God knew I was trying to see Him so He helped me in a unique way.

When I first started my prayer times with the Lord I used to have many visions of me in the throne room with Him. He was sitting on the throne and I did two different things when I was in there. The first vision He would let me brush His long hair,I had a special brush and I stood behind the throne and brushed His hair ever so lovingly. It was my way of ministering to Him. I never saw His face and that didn’t matter because I just wanted to be close to Him.

The second thing I would do was to polish the floor around the throne and I only did this in those early years when I felt I had sinned and it wasn’t pleasing to the Lord. He didn’t make me do this I wanted to do it and He allowed me. It was making me aware of my heart before the Lord. I was a baby Christian at the time of these visions. I now know my Fathers voice and He reveals Himself to me on a different level, directly from the Rhema word from the bible hidden my heart and by the power of the Holy Spirit convicting me.

God is so beautiful and you just know that as you interact with Him more and more. His essence and His love and kindness reveals this about Him. God is pure perfection and we in our sinful nature cannot see Him in these human forms (we can contact Him through prayer). But when God calls us home or Jesus comes to take us…….we shall see Him face to face in all of His Glory and splendor. Oh…I can’t wait to see face!

Message for today: Seek His face…..you won’t see Him face to face….but you can get close to Him because of His grace.

The Holy Spirit of God

June 15, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Prayer Leave a comment

Subtitle – My very personal experience with the Holy Spirit of the Living God

Since about 4:00am today I have felt the presence of the Holy Spirit very powerfully and I heard Him say to tell them about me. Everyone knows that God is a triune God and He is three persons: God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Ghost.

There is so much to tell about the Holy Spirit. It could take a very long time to give you all the scriptures and commentaries. This is a blog and I will let the Spirit Guide me in what to share in this brief time we have together. I encourage you to do a bible study on the Holy Spirit, because the more you know about Him the more you will understand who He is and how He can make your life so much better. You will be so much closer to God and grow in your knowledge of Him.

The Holy Spirit is the third person in the trinity. He is a so many things to me. He lives in me, instructs me, comforts me, fills me with God’s presence, teaches me, produces fruit in me, helps me in my weakness, allows me to have spiritual power, tells me of the secret things of God, prays for me when I can’t, Helps me to carry out good and be good, helps me interpret the scriptures, is present in trouble, helps me to have a sound and non fearful mind, gives me spiritual blessings, takes away my thirst for more of God, helps me keep my faith and keeps me faithful, guides me in all truth, and….. He will never leave me!

Am I blessed or what? Do you know Jesus Christ? Then you are very blessed also.

I have an incredible prayer life and I say that NOT to brag only to say what God has done in my life. I have not always been on the mountain top. I’ve had some awesome experiences and revelations with the Lord and it has only been because of God’s Holy Spirit. Early on in my Christian faith I learned this scripture that changed my life:

1 Corinthians 2:10 But God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God.

When I read this scripture I said to myself “all righty then!!! I can learn everything about God”. That’s why I went so deep into prayer. I wanted to know everything that I could humanly know about this great and powerful God who let me experience His sanctification and love for me first. To feel clean inside and to have all this love poured into my life was the most awesome feeling I ever had.

I spent hours and hours reading the scriptures to learn about God and then I would pray for up to 8 hours a day and I did this for about 7 years straight. I had God dreams, visions, word of knowledge, I mean everything was at the height of every sense I had about God. I was on the mountain top for so long I built a house there. But I didn’t stay there, I went to the valley after that 7 year time and have gone from mountain top to valley over and over again….but that is another blog.

The Holy Spirit is very very powerful and if it wasn’t for Him revealing the living word of the bible and the heart of God to me I would be nothing…..In today’s terms…I would be a hot mess!

I so love God….I so love Jesus….and I so love…………the HOLY SPIRIT!!!!!

The Holy Spirit and I have been through a lot together. He’s been with me in the good times…laughing with me and putting smiles on my face and He’s been there in the very bad times comforting me in a way no man can do for me. He strengthens me…I even feel Him putting His finger under my eyes and holding back my tears when I need to be strong. And when I fall…I feel Him under my arms pulling me up….so I could stand in the midst of my weakness. I love you Holy Spirit…I love you! Thank you for helping me 24/7 earth time.

Message for today: Let go and let God fill you more with His Spirit. Go deeper in God today!.

Migraine sufferers a Message 4 U

June 15, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Prayer 4 Comments

ouch!!!!

ouch!!!!

 

This is the first time I’m writing this late at night, but someone is suffering with migraines and is feeling overwhelmed.

I know you have suffered for a long long time.  You might ask yourself…who knows about all I’ve gone through?  It’s been like a living hell at times.  Doctors, medication, a little caffeine and still those horrible migraines!!  As you lie quietly with the lights out and you wait for the torture to stop…you might wonder when will you be healed of this affliction.  This is a time to depend on God’s grace every time a migraine comes on.  Don’t be discouraged if your healing hasn’t manifested yet.  Don’t ever lose your hope!!!  The headache that you suffer with is NOT who you are.  You are who God made you to be…His beautiful child.  God will reward you for enduring through your suffering.

I pray that the Lord will heal you and that He will give you peace in Jesus name. You are in a battle and need to know others are praying for you and God has heard your prayers today. If you have surfed in from looking around on the internet… I want you to know it was not a mistake that you found this blog today. God cares about you…yes He does.  Read over some of my many other blogs about suffering.  God bless you brother or sister.  Hang in there!!!

Decisions Decisions… What door is the right answer behind?

June 14, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Prayer 2 Comments

Subtitle – Seeking the wisdom of God

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

As I woke up this morning I knew I needed to hear from the Lord about some major decisions I need to make in my life. I feel like I have this big question mark on my forehead. No It’s not the mark of the beast LOL, just a puzzlement of which way should I go.

Way back in the day there was a game show called let’s make a deal and they would have 3 big door with prizes behind them. One had the best prize, one had an OK prize and one had the clunker. The show played off the fact that people have a hard time making decisions.
Being a Christian doesn’t guarantee it will be easy to make decisions, but I can tell you we can make wiser ones.  It’s the motivation behind what we are seeking.  I’ll give you an example:

You need a new car because your car is on its last leg. So you start thinking about what kind of car to get.  Should you get that big $80,000 SUV like your neighbors down the street?  Buzz!!!! Should you go to a car lot and by a cheap car? Buzz!!!!  Should you get that modestly price new Camry prius with the gas saving features? Ding Ding!!!   Wise decision!  What is the godly motivation behind that answer?  The Lord will provide our need and when we ask according to His will things will work out for our good.Now that was easy to figure out but other decisions are not that obvious.

Some decisions will bring you to your knees to pray and you may even have to fast and then……Wait for an answer.  God will guide you if you will bring your request before Him. He loves you and He wants the best for you.

I admit to you I jump ahead of God many times and get myself in all kinds of trouble, then I go to prayer and God says…”why didn’t you come to me first?  I’m like Steve Urkel on TV……did I do that?  Oh the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak saints…..and this is why I say all the time… thank you Jesus for your forgiveness.

Now back to my decision making saga.  I am going to be still and quiet so that I can hear God when he speaks and know when he guides me. I will read His word, Pray and wait. I will look to the hills. I will have my spiritual ears open.

God may give me an obvious answer or a very subtle one but however He does it I need to do my part. Seek His wisdom in the situation.

Psalms 32:8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.

Message for today: Don’t go seeking answers under a rock….Go to the Rock and get a solid answer.

Get Your Belief On

June 11, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit Leave a comment

1 John 5: 14-15 This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. 15 And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.

I felt the Holy Spirit searching my heart this morning asking me about how much I believe in God’s word, His promises and my confidence in Him when I pray.  Uh oh…….I’m in trouble now!  Now don’t get me wrong…… I do believe, but sometimes I do doubt or forget the awesome power that God has. Sometimes I even get a little mad and say to myself (definitely not to God) “well He’s gonna do what He’s gonna do anyway.
Many hard trials are a confidence buster for believing what God can do, but this is why we stay in prayer, read and meditate on His word. When we do these things it is a faith booster. Even when we are weak momentarily in these areas God has provided a very unique help for us.

It is His rhema word. (It is a word that signifies the action of utterance- Wikipedia) When we hide God’s word in our heart, the Holy Spirit will get His word that is hidden to us at that moment and put it into our mind and we remember the word and faith stirs up in us and our confidence soars. We then come boldly into His throne room and ask God, believing.

We don’t ask amiss and have a good idea what His will is because we know what He has promised us in His word. We then patiently wait for an answer. We should keep our eyes on Him throughout our trial praying at all times while waiting for that prayer to be answered.

Believe………….Believe……………..believe!!!!!

Remember also how important it is not only to believe but ask in God’s will.

When my kids were little the ice cream truck would ring his bell and when they heard it they really believed I would buy them their desire……Ice cream.  I would love to give them ice cream every time that truck came down our block (which was about 5 times a day LOL), and I did get them ice cream sometimes but I had to use good judgment and know what was best for them and say no. God is like that with us…..He uses good judgment.

Message for today:  Pray to God your wonderful Father………trust His decisions ……..But also… do get your Belief on!

Mark 23:24 ……“Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!”

Oh no Lord!!! Do I really need a makeover?

June 10, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Prayer 4 Comments

Jeremiah 18: 1-4 1 This is the word that came to Jeremiah from the LORD: 2 “Go down to the potter’s house, and there I will give you my message.” 3 So I went down to the potter’s house, and I saw him working at the wheel. 4 But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him.

Did you ever see those makeover shows on TV and the person comes out looking like a hot mess and then “woola!” they come back out and they look amazing?  Well God does makeovers like that too.  We can be a spiritual hot mess….but the master has all the right stuff to make us beautiful inside…..a makeover.

God said to me today I need a makeover, a remolding, a renewal, a refreshing, a change and a reshaping. No He was not talking about my full figure self ( well maybe that too) but me as a child of God, who I am as a person…..my attitude, my emotional self, my mind, my behavior, well….all of me. OUCH! I recently read this scripture Psalms 139:23 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:  I said to myself no way because I know that there are things I don’t want to face about myself and then wait for a trial that the Master will use to fix me.

Even as I write this I feel bad about thinking that way. I have a lot of trials going on in my life right now so I don’t want any extra test and trials….but wait…….these ARE the trials and test that are remolding me!!! ….Whew!  I’m wiping my brow right now! I have told the Lord to change anything He doesn’t like about me in the past during intense prayer.

This is why I need to get into that secret place with the Lord because when I am that deep in His presence I am so much more submissive to His will because I feel His powerful presence ….I’m more aware of my weak flawed flesh. I’m so humbled before my almighty Father. His Holiness is too much for me to even gaze at. God looks at my heart when I’m deep in the spirit of prayer and He finds things and reveals them to me then I confess my sins to Him and Jesus forgives me. He will fix the problems we have through trials and test so you will learn to not do the negative sinful things again. Come on now…. you know how we humans are….let’s be real…I know I’m not the only one. I want to do right things all the time but like it says in the bible…..the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. (Matt.26:41).

I wrote this poem in 1992:

Potter’s Wheel

 

Help! I’m on the potter’s wheel again

It seems to have no beginning

It seems to have no end

Help me to have patience, perseverance, obedience, and trust

If you don’t help me Lord

I feel I will bust

I’m spinning you see, almost out of control

I can see you’ll get the Glory

As my Story unfolds

Your tender mercy, is just what I need

With your amazing Grace

I know I’ll succeed

Message for today:  Don’t jump off the potter’s wheel….hold on……trust the Master’s skills…..Pray for endurance while He works on you!  I can tell you with 100% assurance we will come out PERFECT in the end. Are you ready for your makeover?

3 Things God has given us for our well being

June 7, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Prayer 3 Comments

 

Psalms 91: 11, 12  For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; 12 they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

Today God reminded me of 3 wonderful gifts that He has given me. There are many others but this is what I needed to hear today.

Angels have many duties for God and one of their duties is to take care of me….and you.  I could list out the many things angels have done for us in the past but you might want to do your own study because it’s a lot of examples in the bible. God wants me to know He has provided SUPERNATURAL assistance for us 24 hours a day 7 days a week 365 days a year…. for every second of our living here on earth. That is awesome people!!! How special is that? Wow!

The next thing He told me this morning is He has put EVERTHING we need to know about Him and life in the bible. The bible is the bestselling book in the world! It has survived the most critical scrutiny and is still powerful because it is the living word of God. Once you read it it’s in your mind and heart and the Holy Spirit will bring the word of God right back to your mind when you need it.  Oh I so needed to remember this today.  Thank you Lord!

So let’s see….we have angels….the living word of God…the bible and we have love.  Love is a gift God gave the world.  (John 3:16) He gave us and show’s us what love is and we are able to give and receive love. I think if we as humans don’t receive love we would get very depressed and eventually lose our mind. ( To get love we need to give love….a little hint for today)

This morning as God is ministering to me I feel His love and not only His love but other love that He’s given me through other people on earth…my very loving husband, my wonderful adult children who have been showing me soooo much love(thank you..I love you too) my parents, family and friends.

Because of the message the Lord has given me today I feel good in my heart right now. It’s His love is working in me and for me.

 

Message for today:  God is all over me!! My comings and my goings are covered.  I should not walk in fear…..I am blessed!

Welcome to God Speaks I Listen and Share

May 31, 2011

camary1996 God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Prayer , 9 Comments

Hello everyone and thank you for stopping by . I’m sure you must be curious about what God is speaking to me about. As a young child I have spoken to God. I was introduced to him by my parents as a toddler and also in Sunday school. I wrote him letters as a child and just talked to Him. One day I asked Him to help me with something that was very important to me and He answered that prayer. From that day on I was a true believer that God was real and He answers prayer.

I became totally committed to God in 1984 and since that day I have had unbelievable prayer times with the Lord.  God the Father,  God the Son,  And God the Holy Spirit are such a major part of my life. I want to share things from my prayer times on a regular basis. I feel this is a journey I want and need to take in my life right now.  I’m a 10 year breast cancer survivor and VERY happy to be alive today.  I’m going to share messages from the Lord as well as testimonies and stories.  Please feel free to subscribe to my blog. God bless you in every way!

God is truly amazing and He amazes me everyday.

Deuteronomy 4:29 But if from there you seek the LORD your God, you will find him if you look for
him with all your heart and with all your soul.

God bless you!

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